Team Bios

What kind of riding do you do?  Well, I'm still working on getting back on my bike as I have patellofemoral syndrome/arthritis; absolutely sucks.  But, I love long road rides.  destination mountain bike rides, and cyclocross.  I like racing CX over road but enjoy both.

Bike Setup: 2009 Felt F3 with SRAM Red, Easton SLX 90 wheels, Arione saddle, & Thompson cockpit.   

Hometown: Laredo Texas.  But, I've lived in Cincy since I was 8 so I'm a native I suppose.  
What got me into cycling: I quite smoking and started riding in 2002 to get a girl.  The relationship faltered but my love affair with bikes begun.  Prior to meeting my badass wife, I actually lost several relationships because of the bike

Favorite Ride:  Blood Sweat and Gears.  100 miles climbing 13000 plus feet.  I got 53 place out of 800 in a time of 5'33.  

Favorite Race: Storming the Greens 2008.  It was an absolute mud fest.  My gears stopped working and I actually endo'd into a sand pit.  

Top Speed: 59.4 mph going down Tanner.  You have to cut the corner and assume the hamster.

How I proposed:  At the top of Lookout Mt. after making Ali climb 1700ft in a 5 mile climb.  She was pissed; until I proposed

Favorite Beer: Imperial IPAs.  Specifically, Southern Tier Unearthly IPA.  ~12% 

Race Category: 4, hoping for 3 soon

Height: 5'2"...in my bike shoes

Weight: Yes

How Many Cats: Not enough to date Adam.

How Many Kids: 2

Hills or Headwind: Hills. Totally.

Known For: Smiling on my bike, having tires that match my bike, getting caught at the front, being tougher than I look.

Stuff about me - I enjoy skinny skiing and going to bullfights on acid.  I like fast bikes more than fast cars, but fast cars are pretty cool too.  

Race Category - 5

Height - 5'9"

Weight - Decreasing

How Many Cats - I only date women who have more than 5 cats.  I have a thing for crazy cat ladies.  Is that weird?

Hills or Headwind - I will take them both.  

Big Bang Theory - I buy it.  

Stage Name: The Doc
Race Category: Cat 3.  
Race Discipline: Road

Bike Setup: Felt FC frame, SRAM, Zippys

So you do Cross?  I do it for the free socks.
Notable Finish: St Leon Road Race, first place, then followed by KY state road champ. 
Post Race Drink: Whatever Alex or other Soigneurs bring me.  The sweet nectar of winning a $5 gift card in prize money or a vuvuzela.

Who is the epitome of the alpha-male: Mario Cipolini or Silvio Burlesconi?  Silly.  Cipo.  Always.
Post Training Drink: A coke or espresso at a Belgian cafe.  Who says cycling is an elitest sport?
Hill Climber, Time Trial Freak, or Sprinter? I like to go up.
What’s the nicest thing anyone has said about you? My mother has the nicest things to say but consider the source.

We hear you have no dimmer- it's only on or off on training rides: I like hearing Alex complain. 

What kind of riding do you do? I love riding bikes. Mountain bikes got me all hungry to ride when I was a teen, now in my late thirties I ride a little of everything (mostly bikes).
Where will we find you at the races? You will find me on the sidelines when I can. I try to support the boys out there burning up the road from behind the scenes.
Hometown: I fucking love Cincinnati.
Favorite pre-race meal: Skyline made at home, no cheese.
Best local homebrew: Right now I love Listerman’s Beer Supply kits. I have 2 on tap that I brewed and 2 in fermentation.
Favorite Imperial Stout: There are too many that have not touched my lips to have a favorite. Best commercial IPA: Stone Brewing. Whiskey, plain water, or superendurodydropowermax? Whiskey.
Prefer to ride on pavement, dirt and rock, or sand and barriers? Dirt.
Favorite training ride: Any one that includes 1121.
How long have you been riding? Since 1989.
Favorite bike setup: Pivot Mach 5 XT, this bike has changed my life.
Best race finish: 3rd at the 24 Hours of Vulchers Knob.
Rather train with yer buds, barbecue, or race in the cold wind and rain? I love to train with my buds and grill out when done.
Post ride drink: Water then beer.

What kind of riding do you do?  Long, hard, and often…

Race Discipline: Road, CX, Freestyle Kayak, and skateboarding

Bike Setup: (Ridley + Campy)/Moustache = Rocket

Hometown:  Cincinnati!

What got me into cycling: I retired from professional Kayaking, so I needed another challenge.   Plus, all this lycra makes the ladies hot!

Notable Finish:  Dropping fools for a solid 2^nd at Harbin Park for the Cincy3 UCI Weekend!  I hear the dude that won the race is a dick…

Pre Race Meal: Hot Pocket or a Lean Pocket (I hear they are good for you), Hot Fries and Coke

Post Training Drink: PBR Bitches!

Favorite Ride:  I love the runs where I get to drop a 30ft waterfall,,, Oh wait, wrong interview…  Any ride where I get to chase down James or Hooton has got to be a favorite!  I’ll get them… soon.

Eric Puryear What do the guys call you? Eric.
Yeah, but Eric what? Just Eric, is that not good enough? Don’t treat me like Scootero.
But Eric, I’m just a machine. This is weird, next question please.
Ok, ok. Occupation? Two-wheeled hustler, aww snap, take that!!
Interesting. Seriously, move on.
Style Diktats: White saddle and bartape. Glasses go over the straps. Small waterbottle only. Race disciplines: Road, crits, and Cyclocross.
Secret ingredients: Pre-ride: water, Post-ride: espresso, Anytime: Fine oak-aged jiggle-juice by my man Geo. Dickel.

Stage Name: G Master
Race Category: Has Been 
Race Discipline: Roadie (80's hair bands)
Notable Finish: When I was fast... 
Post Race Drink: -----------
Post Training Drink: Blood Infusion
Favorite Type of Ride? Ones where I get lost in Kentucky. 
What’s the nicest thing anyone has said about you? "Nice Hair Shorts"

"helmet cam"

CAT: Cat 4 Road - enough cats to be dating Adam, but his plumbing is not compatible.

Beverage: I'm from Kantucky, it's gotta be Bourbon

Post Race Beverage: I drink my competitors tears.

Riding Style:   Often, usually with a pack of guys

Occupation: School Psychologist on the clock, carper cleaner off.

Favorite Pro Cyclist: Katie Compton and Mario Cippolini's love child.

Story: Too bad my "Spring Relationship Series" didn't end as well as the "Spring Road Series"...

Most Notable Finish:  2nd Overall in Spring Series (cat 3/4).  1st at Huston Woods (it was a Hungry sign)

Hills or Rollers:  HILLS.  Rollers are for ppl who need to train more.

Stage Name: That guy with the jean shorts 

Race Category: Cat 5, soon to be 4 look out.

 
Race Discipline: Road and looking forward to tearing up CX this fall.

Notable Finish: 1st place cat 5 while sick at vandervorts corner I was pretty hungry that day!

Post Race Drink: Mad Dog 20/20, espresso, or water? whatever is on hand, usually stars homebrew.

Post Training Drink: Chocolate milk the only drink you ever need besides a little rum here and there.

Hill Climber, Time Trial Freak, or Sprinter? look for the 8ball helmet cresting the hill... Sometimes mixing it up in the sprint for 1st too.

Race Category: CAT 2 CX Cat 3 Road
Notable Finish: CAT 3 Ohio State CX Champ ‘09
Post Race Drink: Mad Dog 20/20, espresso, or water? Starr’s Homebrew, and Kentucky Moonshine
Post Training Drink: Quad shot con panna.
Hill Climber, Time Trial Freak, or Sprinter? Whatever I have to do to kick your ass on the CX course.

...Chew on Meaning...

“Mike C is nominated for the best rolled L’s.
DB is nominated for the best sold spells
K-Train is often hated cuz he has less cells,
New breed, Team Hungry, Takin’ Over”    

 -Brent Emoff

i heard if i join this team i get more beer.  i'm here, im queer, let's beer.

Stage Name(s): Post-modern Hillbilly, Dummy, The Principal, The Reverend Dr. Walter T. Jamison Luvjoy Sr., and James.

Race Category: Cat 5 Road, Knocking at the Cat 3 door in CX...

Race Discipline: I race... but without discipline.

Notable Finish: I once won a dance competition in middle school...does that count.  If not, I'll take my Harbin Park win at the Cincy3 UCI weekend! 

Post Race Drink: Beer, Beer, and sometimes Beer.

Post Training Drink: Is this the same question?

Favorite Ride? Ones that involve getting the jump on JamesO only to have him discredit my awesomeness with his never ending list of mechanical difficulties (eg. my brakes were rubbing, my shifter was slipping, my tire was flat... you get the picture).  Or, anything that has Billy Craig breathing down my neck trying to eat my lunch. 

What’s the nicest thing anyone has said about you? You've got a lot of teeth for a hillbilly... Where did you say you were from again?

cat: Cat 2 CX / Cat 4 Road / Cat / Dog

previous life: After riding my skateboard for 30+ years I thought I'd try something a little less painful. Turns out, bikes are painful...

stuff: Riding with friends. My team always helps me get up the hill. I would rather stick to the flats...

mission: ride bikes to escape...

huh: i jumped my snowboard 100+ feet in colorado. scared the crap out of me.

good results: 2010, cat 4 35+ state champ. 2011, cat 3 35+ 1st place OVCX Kings

disciplines: extremely() -  road, cx, mountain, track, salad, soup...

love: i LOVE my family!!! smiles for miles!

Self Inflated Importance Name: Scootero Pardini

So then, what is your last name? My name includes my last name, it’s Pardi. What the hell?

Hill Climber, Time Trial Freak, Sprinter or Wheel Sucker? Uhh, how bout you ride out to Buffalo Ridge with me and we’ll see who the wheel sucker is.

What kind of riding do you do: MTN, Road, Bareback on Bull, or CX? What? I do Road and CX and want to try MTN, but I don’t think I like where these questions are going.

Ok, ok, sorry. Favorite Chicken: Cooked, no beak. That’s more like it.

Race Category: CAT slobber mouth, snot flow out nose #4.

Where should we look for you on the race course: First over the line with shit eating grin and nose-picking finger pointed to the sky, foaming at the mouth in a breakaway, hiding in the peloton, or off the back pretending to enjoy the scenery? Hidin’ out and talking trash in the women’s Cat 3 peloton.

Michael Starr

Race Category: Cat4 (Road), Cat4 (CX) and Cat4 (Track)

Years Racing:  4

Background:  I like bikes.  I like riding on bikes, racing on bikes, and commuting on bikes; wrenching bikes, re-purposing bikes, and teaching bikes; little bikes, big bikes, and mutant bikes; friends on bikes, teamates on bikes, and good times on bikes; metallic bikes, organic bikes, and hybrid bikes; track bikes, road bikes, and CX bikes... did I mention I like bikes and riding them too?

Race Category:  Road Cat 4, Cross Cat 3

Height: 1.8 Meters

Weight: 78 Kilograms (off season)  73 Kilograms (race season)

Riding Style:If its below 50F i'd rather be playing in the mud dropping fools.  Dreaming of elite CX racing in the next year.  Dangerous attacks into the head winds.  Out sprinting any one if they even look at me wrong.  Please don't make me climb.  Tell me I look europro and i'll let you lead me out.

Notable Finish:  I finished one Gold Sprint race early in the season against Mike Starr.  4th Place Portland USGP Day 2, 1st Place Cat 4 Capp City Cross at Coffman Park, 7th at Gun Club CX.  

Team Duties:  Washing bikes for PBR's.  Cracking obscene jokes with Andrew and Scott.  Making Michael Chewning shake his head at me at least 6 times per group ride.  

Favorite Food:  Usually i like to read what the pro's are eating pre and post race.  Mostly Liquigas and Cofidis.  Those teams are super Euro so i like to stick to that sort of diet.  Heavy on espresso, nutella, pasta.  Pasta with nutella and honey served cold is suuuuper euro so i like to have that.  Mostly on rides.  Its easy if you pre wrap the pasta on a stick.

Funniest Cycling Mishap/ Wardrobe Malfunction:  Zachary Cahill.  That is all.

Favorite Quote:  Ivan Basso on asked what he listens to pre race  " I lika da euro beatz,  very good for my soul.  I's see beautiful women at the finish line waiting for me to dance and dance.  So i's dance on my pedals till I's see them. Thank you sir."

Mike Chewning Is Your Daddy?:  Yes.  

Race Catergory: Road Cat 4, Cross Cat 4 (soon to be 3)

Years Racing: 3

About Me: I have a twin (so don't be insulted if I don't talk to you, it is probably him.)  I enjoying biking and it is really what I think about all the time.  I love being outdoors and being in nature.  When it is really cold, I enjoy skiing.  

Best Result: Was 3rd in my first cross race and it has been down hill from there.

Favorite Ride: Riding up Mt. Mitchell from the the south side.

Best Toast: Cinnamon